吐息檻 || A Cage of Sighs

歌詞

吐き出した塊に一滴の涙を

閉じた目蓋に映る過去は
ほんの数時間前の記憶

「所詮こんなものだね」と
語る先は窓ガラス

アァ、行き交う人の群れでさえも
暗闇を蠢く蟻のよう

静かに吐いた溜め息も
窓を曇らせ湿るだけ
呟いた戯言は
はじき返されたようだ

吐き出した後悔は
誰にあてるでもなくて
飲み込んだ愛惜は
空しさだけ残した

握り締めた寡黙な携帯電話
いたずらにいたずらに熱を移す

叩き付けた感情も言葉も
消えはしないのに

アァ、行き交う人の群れの中に
ただ一人を見つけられはしない

沈んだ液晶に向けて
繰り返し囁く言葉
たった四文字のために
時間だけ浪費して

吐き出した後悔は
誰に届くでもなくて
飲み込んだ愛惜は
孤独だけを運んだ

伝い落ちた雫は涙の軌跡のように
曇りガラスを引き裂いて喘いでいる
千々に削れた景色羨むように眺めて
まるで牢獄のようだと形容しては
自嘲に笑った

吐き出した塊は醜い心そのもの
吐き出せない本心は涙になり流れた

物言わぬ手の中の塊に許しを請い
それでもまだ押せない
緑色のスイッチ
甘えた独り言

静寂も暗闇も切り裂き
君の名前が見えたなら…

Romanisation

hakidashita katamari ni hitoshizuku no namida o

tojita mabuta ni utsuru kako wa
hon no suujikan mae no kioku

“shosen konna mono da ne” to
kataru saki wa mado garasu

aa, yukikau hito no mure de sae mo
kurayami o ugomeku ari no you

shizuka ni haita tameiki mo
mado o kurase shitataru dake
tsubuyaita tawagoto wa
hajiki kaesareta you da

hakidashita koukai wa
dare ni ateru demo nakute
nomikonda aiseki wa
munashisa dake nokoshita

nigirishimeta kamoku na keitai
itazura ni itazura ni netsu o utsutsu

tataki tsuketa kanjou mo kotoba mo
kie wa shinai noni

aa, yukikau hito no mure no naka ni
tada hitori o mitsukerare wa shinai

shizunda ekishou ni mukete
kurikaeshi sasayaku kotoba
tatta yon moji no tame ni
jikan dake rouhi shite

hakidashita koukai wa
dare ni todoku demo nakute
nomikonda aiseki wa
kodoku dake o hakonda

tsutai ochita shizuku wa namida no kiseki no you ni
kumori garasu o hikisaite aeide iru
chiji ni kezureta keshiki uramu you ni nagamete
maru de rougoku no you da to keiyou shite wa
jichou ni waratta

hakidashita katamari wa minikui kokoro sono mono
hakidasenai honshin wa namida ni nari nagareta

monoiwanu te no naka no katamari ni yurushi o koi
sore demo mada osenai
midori-iro no suicchi
amaeta hitorigoto

seijaku mo kurayami mo kirisaki
kimi no namae ga mieta nara…

Translation

I shed a tear on the lump I vomited up.

The past I see when I close my eyes
Is formed from memories of mere hours ago.

“What will be will be…”
I’m speaking at a window.

Ah… Even the crowds of people going back and forth
are like ants squirming in the dark.

My silent sighs, too,
Merely cloud the window and dampen it.
The nonsense I muttered
Seems to have snapped back to me.

The regret I vomited up
doesn’t hit anyone.
The adoration I gulped down
left only emptiness behind.

I gripped my silent mobile.
Mischievously, mischievously, it transfers its heat.

The feelings and words I threw
won’t ever fade away…

Ah… I am in a crowd of people going back and forth
and I can’t find even a single person.

Facing the submerged liquid crystals,
I whisper the same words.
For the sake of four letters,
I just waste time.

The regret I vomited up
doesn’t reach anyone.
The adoration I gulped down
carried only isolation.

The fallen droplets are like traces of tears.
I tear through the frosted glass and gasp.
I gaze at the scenery, shaved into many pieces, as if envying it.
Comparing it to something like a jail,
I laughed mockingly at myself.

The lump I vomited up was my hideous heart itself.
My true feelings, which I can’t vomit up, became tears and flowed away.

I beg for forgiveness from the silent lump in my hands.
Still, I can’t push
the emerald switch.
What a childish soliloquy.

If I could only tear through the stillness and the darkness
and see your name…