親愛なるあなたは火葬 || Want To Be Cremated

shin’ai naru anata wa kasou
Want To Be Cremated

Vocals: 初音ミク (Hatsune Miku)
Lyrics: 虻瀬犬 (ABU-SE-KEN)
Composed by: 虻瀬犬 (ABU-SE-KEN)
Upload date: 16 November 2019

Requested by: Cinnamon Kitty
Watch the official video on YouTube!

Content warning: This song contains themes of gore and suicide

The English title is the official title. A literal translation of the Japanese title is ‘You, My Beloved, are Cremated.’


吐いていて怪獣 嘔吐 out と
夜は 怪獣になりたいだって

参上 相対 平行線
本能 崩壊 精神性

俺は怪獣だよ 知っておいて

吐いていたフラニー 嘔吐 out と
裂傷 残響 体液を
羊水 損壊 歪な子 こ?
ねえ 壊獣になれそうなんだ

俺はさ 歩みを止めていたんだよ
愚かだ 殺せよ
君がさ 愛した正しい家族を
俺のさ 眼に焼き付けて欲しい

卵巣は? 精巣は?
肝臓は? 肺胞は?
精神は? 本能は?
信仰は? 病んだな
乱性だ 崩性だ
壊性だ 凶性だ
本性だ 本性だ
本性だ 知ってる

惨状 包帯 平行線
本能 崩壊 精神性

そうか 本当に聴こえないんだ

それが 首を括る所以なんて


haiteite kaijuu outo out to
kitanai ko ni wa furecha ikemasen yo
sore kurai ore ni mo wakarimasu
otaku no oitade manako ga itai
yoru wa kaijuu ni naritai datte
kaijuu naraba koroseru kara tte
kaijuu ni mo narenai kuse ni
ore wa yoru aruite ita

sanjou soutai heikousen
ookami otoko no bansankai
honnou houkai seishinsei
sonbou kachi nante moto kara nai
furanii dou dai shuutai de
kuraimaa natte mo daijoubu
ore ga inaku natte ageru yo
kono ba kara

shinkou taishou wa dare dakke?
ore wa kaijuu da yo shitte oite
unatte mo unatte mo kikoenai
souka kikoenai nara shikata ga nai na
kimi wa uso ga tokui na you de
ore o sono ki ni saseru no mo rakushou de
itsu no ma ni ka onaji tokoro de nenne shite
furanii wa ore no ko o haranda sou da

haiteita furanii outo out to
umareru ko ni wa kami no jihi o to
soredake ore wa negau dake
zoi wa ittai kono ba de nani o shitan da?
resshou zankyou taieki o
yousui sonkai ibitsu na ko ko?
kaijuu ni nare sou nan da
nee kaijuu ni nare sou nan da

ore ni wa muri da to hontou ni wa mou rikai shitetaro?
soredemo kimi ga sa “itekure” to iu to
ore wa sa ayumi o tomete itan da yo
oroka da korose yo
shizuka ni shiniyuku dousou nagamete
ore dake urei ni hitari ni ikasete
kimi ga sa aishita tadashii kazoku o
ore no sa me ni yakitsukete hoshii

ransou wa? seisou wa?
kanzou wa? haihou wa?
seishin wa? honnou wa?
shinkou wa? yanda na
ransei da housei da
kaishou da kyousei da
honshou da honshou da
honshou da shitteru

sanjou houtai heikousen
ookami otoko no bansankai
honnou houkai seishinsei
zonmei kachi nante moto kara nai
furanii dou dai shuutai de
furaiyaa ni natte mo daijoubu?
ore mo inaku natte ageru
ima koko de

shinkou taishou wa dare dakke
ore wa kaijuu da ne shittetan da
unatte mo unatte mo kikoenai
sou ka hontou ni kikoenain da
shougai kodoku no kaijuu ni
yume o misasete kureta kimi wa
ai da ka koi da ka katakonbe
ore no seishun nado choukai datta

ten ni mo chi ni mo mesarezu ni
hana wa furanii no haka ni saite
waratteru waratteru wake mo naku
ore wa shinkousha ni umare kawatta
aishita koroshita sore dake da
sore ga kubi o kukuru yuen nante
unatte mo unatte mo kimi dake wa
ore o daisuki da to itte kureta


The monster throws up, vomiting it out.
Filthy children mustn’t touch it.
Even I knew that much.
My eyes hurt from your family’s mischief.
I wanted to be a monster at night
‘cuz if I was a monster I could kill them.
I couldn’t even turn into a monster
and yet I went walking at night.

Come calling. Confrontation. Parallel lines.
This is the werewolf’s banquet.
Instincts. Collapse. Spirituality.
Existence has no worth to begin with.
Franny, what do you think? Such a shameful sight.
It’s fine to become a climber.
For you, I’ll disappear
from this place.

Who is the target of their faith?
I’m a monster. Remember that.
I howl and howl, but you can’t hear me.
Really? If you can’t hear me, there’s nothing I can do about that.
You seem like a good liar
and you’re good at turning me on.
Before we knew it, it was nighty-night in the same bed.
It seems like Franny was pregnant with my child.

Franny was throwing up, vomiting it out.
All I was wishing was for God’s benevolence
for the child that would be born.
What on earth did Zoy do here?
Lacerations. Echoes. Bodily fluids.
Amniotic fluid. Damage. A twisted child. A child?
It seemed like they were gonna become a monster.
See, they looked like they’d become a destructive monster.

You already realised that it was impossible for me, right?
And yet you told me to be by your side.
You know, I’d stopped walking.
What an idiot. Kill me!
You silently die, and I watch you flounder.
Let me be the only one to die, lost in melancholy.
I want you to burn the proper family you loved
right into my eyes.

Ovaries? Testicles?
Liver? Lungs?
Mind? Instinct?
Faith? They’re all ill.
Riotous. Destructive.
Hostile. Wicked.
It’s their true nature, true nature,
true nature. I know.

A gruesome sight. Bandages. Parallel lines.
This is the werewolf’s banquet.
Instincts. Caving in. Spirituality.
Life has no value to begin with.
Franny, what do you think? Such a shameful sight.
Is it okay to become a flier?
For you, I’ll die as well
right here, right now.

Who’s the target of their faith?
I’m a monster. I knew it all along.
I howl and howl, but you can’t hear me.
Really? You actually can’t hear me.
I’m a destructive monster, alone for life,
and you showed me a dream.
In a catacomb of love or romance
my youth was disciplined.

Without ascending to heaven or earth,
the flowers bloom at Franny’s grave.
I’m laughing, laughing, without a reason.
I was reborn as a believer.
I loved and I killed, and that’s all there is to it.
To think, that’s why I hung myself.
I howled and howled, yet you
were the only one who said you loved me.



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2 responses to “親愛なるあなたは火葬 || Want To Be Cremated”

  1. Roman Piper Avatar
    Roman Piper

    From my knowledge (and I may be wrong, being a LOT more amateur) the way to pronounce their name is Ken Endo(u)! since 遠藤 is commonly pronounced as えんどう and their name on youtube is ケン as of right now

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Releska Avatar

      Thanks! They hadn’t changed their name to ケン when I originally published this translation, which is why I was confused…

      I’ve added some more info, we’ll see if they change their name again.


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