たゆたい || Vertigo

見放された僕は今日も唯
ふらゝ 彷徨いている
混濁化した風に靡いては
だぶついた夢に浸りゆく

僕はもう何もかも分からないよ

朦朧、一層の事此の侭で良いか
気鬱が失せるならば
後悔なんて無いから
蹌々、揺蕩い続けて目が廻って
世界はネガに成って空回り

雲隠れ 小火騒ぎ 玉響に

見放された僕は今日も又
自意識が灰に成って
暗澹に襲われ吐瀉している
混迷を抱く侭腐りゆく

こんな塵界に溺れて
損な人体に汚れ目
人怖めしては遠吠え
求めて 戯けて 逆上せ目

自己嫌悪の雨に打たれる侭
奴に苦しめられる位なら
φの精神に充たされた
μの海に浸って…

朦朧、一層の事此の侭で良いんだ
奴が悦んでいるのなら
後悔なんて無いのさ
踉々、揺蕩い続けて目が廻って
視界靉靆してバタンキフ

壊れる僕 荒んだ空の下一疋(ひとり)
気付けばもう浪々の身
想えば想う程息も
絶えゞに成って

朦朧、一層の事此の侭で良いや
気鬱が失せるならば
後悔なんて無いから
飄々、揺蕩い続けて目が廻って
世界が嘘に成ってサヤウナラ

Mihanasareta boku wa kyou mo tada
Furara urotsuite iru
Kondakuka shita kaze ni nabiite wa
Dabutsuita yume ni hitari yuku

Boku wa mou nani mo kamo wakaranai yo

Mourou, issou no koto kono mama de ii ka
Kiutsu ga useru naraba
Koukai nante nai kara
Sousou, tayutai tsuzukete me ga mawatte
Sekai wa nega ni natte karamawari

Kumogakure boya sawagi tamayura ni

Mihanasareta boku wa kyou mo mata
Jiishiki ga hai ni natte
Antan ni osoware tosha shite iru
Konmei o idaku mama kusari yuku

Konna chinkai ni oborete
Sonna jintai ni yogoreme
Hitogorome shite wa tooboe
Motomete odokete nobose me

Jiko ken’o no ame ni utareru mama
Yatsu ni kurushimerareru kurai nara
Fai no seishin ni mitasareta
Myuu no umi ni hitatte…

Mourou, issou no koto kono mama de ii nda
Yatsu ga yorokonde iru no nara
Koukai nante nai no sa
Rouou, tayutai tsuzukete me ga mawatte
Shikai aitai shite batankifu

Kowareru boku susanda sora no moto hitori
Kizukeba mou rourou no mi
Omoeba omou hodo iki mo
Taeda ni natte

Mourou, issou no koto kono mama de ii ya
Kiutsu ga useru naraba
Koukai nante nai kara
Hyouhyou, tayutai tsuzukete me ga mawatte
Sekai ga uso ni natte sayounara

I was abandoned, and today
I’m just prowling around aimlessly.
I bend in the chaotic wind
and immerse myself in all-too-large dreams.

I don’t understand anything anymore.

I guess it’s better if things stay vague, as they are
because if my depression went away
then I’d have no regrets.
I stagger and keep drifting around with my eyes spinning.
The world turns negative and goes round in circles.

I disappear. The small fire runs wild for a moment.

I was abandoned, and today
my self-consciousness turns to ash again.
I’m attacked by the darkness and get nauseous.
I rot away in my confusion.

I drown in this filthy world
and stains remain on my lacking body.
I fear people and howl away.
I want them and I joke around with bloodshot eyes.

If I’m gonna be tormented by those people
while being beaten down by a deluge of self-loathing
then I’ll immerse myself in a sea of μ
that’s been filled with the spirit of φ.

I guess it’s better if things stay vague, as they are
because if those people are happy
then I’d have no regrets.
I stagger and keep drifting around with my eyes spinning.
My vision clouds over and I fall in a heap.

I’m broken and alone beneath stormy skies.
Before I knew it, I had nowhere to return to.
The more I think about it
the more halting my breaths become.

I guess it’s better if things stay vague, as they are
because if my depression went away
then I’d have no regrets.
I keep drifting around, detached from the world, with my eyes spinning.
The world turns into a lie. Farewell.