石けんと薬 || Soap and Medicine

石けんと薬
sekken to kusuri
Soap and Medicine

Vocals: flower
Lyrics: nuyuri (ぬゆり)
Composed by: nuyuri (ぬゆり)
Album: protoplan
Circle: nulut
Event: C93

Requested by: Shea

I forgot how much I like nuyuri’s lyrics – I can never quite tell if I’ve interpreted them correctly, but they paint some interesting images and sound great. They feel almost… mathematical, I guess?


手に余るほどの 目には見えないはずの平凡を
壊して満たしてひた隠しきって 生活のために命を使って
喉元を見れば分からないものが巻き付いている
息が詰まる何秒か前までに頭の毒に自由を奪われる
飲み込みたければ現実を射抜いておくれよ
空が割れることを待っているだけ 何もしないままじゃ放っとけないから
貴方の不安は沢山の息から生まれている
「そばに居てほしい」なんて気休めだ
嘘も本当もどっちでも無いでしょう?

te ni amaru hodo no me niwa mienai hazu no heibon o
kowashite mitashite ita kakushi kitte seikatsu no tame ni inochi o tsukatte
nodomoto o mireba wakaranai mono ga makitsuite iru
iki ga tsumaru nanbyou ka mae made ni atama no doku ni jiyuu o ubawareru
nomikomitakereba genjitsu o inuite okure yo
sora ga wareru koto o matte iru dake nani mo shinai mama ja hottokenai kara
anata no fuan wa takusan no iki kara umarete iru
“soba ni ite hoshii” nante kiyasume da
uso mo hontou mo docchi demo nai deshou?

My mediocrity must have been invisible, and it was too much to handle.
I destroyed it, was satisfied, and then hid it. I use life for the sake of my livelihood.
I look at the base of my throat and see something unknown coiled around it.
I’m choking. The poison in my head stole my freedom until a few seconds ago.
If you want to drink it down, pierce through reality
because I can’t just leave you alone doing nothing, waiting for the sky to split apart.
Your unease was born from many breaths.
“I want to be with you.” That’s nothing but consolation.
It’s neither true nor false, is it?

あなたの思いは思い出になってしまった
古い空気を吸って吐き出しているだけ
浮かばない言葉を晴らすために追いつこうとしないでくれ!

anata no omoi wa omoide ni natte shimatta
furui kuuki o sutte hakidashite iru dake
ukabanai kotoba o harasu tame ni oitsukou to shinaide kure!

Your feelings became memories.
All I do is breathe and spit out stale air.
Don’t chase after me to clear away words that don’t come to mind!

追い風よさらば 一人で一人じゃない僕らは
例えばだけど 今更だけど 囚われ合いのまま
どうやって逝こうか すり潰されるために
あと少しだけ もう少しだけ
息が続くことを祈り震えている

oikaze yo saraba hitori de hitori ja nai bokura wa
tatoeba dakedo imasara dakedo toraware ai no mama
dou yatte ikou ka suritsubusareru tame ni
ato sukoshi dake mou sukoshi dake
iki ga tsudzuku koto o inori furuete iru

Farewell, o tailwind! We, who are alone yet not alone,
remain captive to each other, though it’s only an example and too late.
How shall I pass to be ground to dust?
Only a little longer, just a little longer now.
I tremble while praying to keep breathing.

細切れの恋を貼り縫い留め繋ぎ合わせて
それがどこの誰とも知らぬ人の生き餌になっていくことも知らずに
殺意を明かせば幾千の目線に焼かれていく
「神のみぞ知る」なんて今更 責任感もへったくれも無いでしょう?

komagire no koi o hari nuitome tsunagi awasete
sore ga doko no dare to mo shiranu hito no iki e ni natte iku koto mo shirazu ni
satsui o akaseba ikusen no mesen ni yakarete iku
“kami nomi zo shiru” nante imasara sekininkan mo hettakure mo nai deshou?

I stick down fragments of love and sew them together
without knowing that it’s becoming live bait for some unknown person out there.
If I reveal my intent to kill I’ll be burned by a thousand stares.
“God only knows.” It’s too late for that! I guess it’s to hell with a sense of responsibility, huh?

思い出はとうに振り返るべき過去になり
残りの僕らは選ぶのをやめていた
名前も意味も奪われたままの僕らを見放してくれ!

omoide wa tou ni furikaeru beki kako ni nari
nokori no bokura wa erabu no o yamete ita
namae mo imi mo ubawareta mama no bokura o mihanashite kure!

Memories have long become a past to think back on.
Those of us who remain had given up choosing.
Ignore us! We are those whose names and purpose were stolen away.

幼いまま 拙いまま 前だけを見据えていた
足元を狙う悪意に気取られて
倒したまま 壊したまま 終わりのまま見つめて
また次の視線を作る

osanai mama tsutanai mama mae dake o misuete ita
ashimoto o nerau akui ni kidorarete
taoshita mama kowashita mama owari no mama mitsumete
mata tsugi no shisen o tsukuru

Still so young, still so inept, I just looked back on what came before.
I was caught up in spite aimed underfoot.
While collapsed, while destroyed, I looked at the end as it was
and I created yet another perspective.

追い風よさらば 一人で一人じゃない僕らは
例えばだけど 今更だけど 囚われ合いのまま
どうやって逝こうか 野次馬の君のために
どこにも行けず 誰にもなれず
只の自分なのを怯え震えてろ

oikaze yo saraba hitori de hitori ja nai bokura wa
tatoeba dakedo imasara dakedo toraware ai no mama
dou yatte ikou ka yajiuma no kimi no tame ni
doko ni mo ikezu dare ni mo narezu
tada no jibun na no o obie furuetero

Farewell, o tailwind! We, who are alone yet not alone,
remain captive to each other, though it’s only an example and too late.
How shall I pass for the sake of you, an onlooker?
Unable to go anywhere, unable to be anyone,
I will tremble in fear of my ordinary self.

さらばさらば

saraba saraba

Farewell, farewell…

プロトディスコ || protodisco

protoplanプロトディスコ
purotodisuko
protodisco

Vocals: flower
Lyrics: nuyuri (ぬゆり)
Composed by: nuyuri (ぬゆり)
Album: protoplan
Circle: nulut
Event: C93

Requested by: Tempera
Watch the official PV here!

It goes without saying, but the meaning of this song changes a lot depending on your interpretation. We’ve got one あなた (anata – ‘you’) and one あたし (atashi – ‘I’ [feminine]), but everything else is a blank slate. It’s good practice to assume that unattributed lines are spoken by the speaker, but this song felt… different. Is the speaker a god-like figure, issuing commands to someone beneath them?


おんなじだけ夢を見てる狡猾さに
違う言葉を今ただ待ち続けている
今しがた終わるはずだった想像に
延命処置を続けてまだ息を注ぐ

onnaji dake yume o miteru koukatsusa ni
chigau kotoba o ima tada machi tsudzukete iru
ima shigata owaru hazu datta souzou ni
enmei shochi o tsudzukete mada iki o tsugu

Faced with the slyness of having the same dreams
I’m still waiting for different words, even now.
My imagination should have ended just now
but I continue life support and keep pouring breath into it.

代わりの利く感動を 焼き増しのドラマチックを
あなたへ
あなたへ
語り得ぬさいはての奥を無理矢理繋ぎ
奪わないで 無くさないで それから

kawari no kiku kandou o yakimashi no doramachikku o
anata e
anata e
katari enu saihate no oku o muri yari tsunagi
ubawanaide nakusanaide sore kara

I’ll give replaceable passion and the photo of a dramatic scene
to you…
to you.

I attempt in vain to fill the depths of the unspoken ends.
Don’t take it away. Don’t get rid of it. After that…

どうか!
もっと嫌って 際限なんか奪って
衝動なんかもうどうなってもいい
崇める意味が溢れる前に
オリジナルの地獄に落ちて

douka!
motto kiratte saigen nanka ubatte
shoudou nanka mou dou nattemo ii
agameru imi ga afureru mae ni
orijinaru no jigoku ni ochite

Please!
Hate even more and steal away the limits.
Impulses don’t matter anymore.
Before the meaning you worship overflows,
Fall into original hell.

どうか
もっと祈って 這い蹲って祈って
偶像なんか追い縋っていて
失っていろ 蹴落としていろ
作り上げた虚無に胡座をかいていろ

douka
motto inotte hai tsukubatte inotte
guuzou nanka oi sugatte ite
ushinatte iro keotoshite iro
tsukuri ageta kyomu ni agura o kaite iro

Please,
Pray even more. Grovel and pray!
Idol-like things are hot on your heels.
Part with them. Kick them down.
Sit cross-legged upon the nihility you constructed.

カラカラの脳味噌を絞り続けている
踊らされることをまだ自覚している

kara kara no noumiso o shibori tsudzukete iru
odorasareru koto o mada jikaku shite iru

You continue to rack your empty brain.
You’re still aware that you’re being manipulated.

安全な街の中で君が見据えているものは
あたしだ
あたしだ
吐き出し捨てていくことさえ咎められなくて
笑わないで 厭わないで 歪んで

anzen na machi no naka de kimi ga misuete iru mono wa
atashi da
atashi da
haki dashi sutete iku koto sae togamerarenakute
warawanaide itowanaide yugande

In a safe street, your eyes are fixed
on me…
on me.

You can’t even be blamed for spitting me out and throwing me away.
Don’t laugh. Don’t avoid it. Be twisted…

どうか!
もっと惑って キャッチーを奪って
救援なんかもう来なくてもいい
忘れるなんて出来ないくらい
脳髄にちゃんと擦り込んで

douka!
motto madotte kyacchii o ubatte
kyuuen nanka mou konakutemo ii
wasureru nante dekinai kurai
nouzui ni chanto suri konde

Please!
Be more bewildered and steal catchiness away.
It doesn’t matter if help is on its way anymore.
Rub things into your brain so much
you can’t forget about them.

どうか
もっと描いて 空想なんて拭って
盲信ばっかもう窮屈なの
油を差して 火を灯して
錆びついている言語に血を通してみて

douka
motto egaite kuusou nante nugutte
moushin bakka mou kyuukutsu nano
abura o sashite hi o tomoshite
sabi tsuite iru gengo ni chi o tooshite mite

Please
draw more and rub away daydreams.
Just believing blindly in things is so uncomfortable now.
Put the oil in, light the lamp,
And let blood flow through rusty words.

明快な回答は無く
こんな歌だって陳腐なんだ
再来の審議ばっかで
まだ踊り足りないの!

meikai na kaitou wa naku
konna uta datte chinpu nanda
sairai no shingi bakka de
mada odori tarinai no!

There are no clear answers.
This song is so cliched, too.
I’m just thinking about coming back…
I haven’t danced enough yet!

どうか
もっと嫌って 際限なんか奪って
衝動なんかもうどうなってもいい
崇める意味が溢れる前に
オリジナルの地獄に落ちて

douka!
motto kiratte saigen nanka ubatte
shoudou nanka mou dou nattemo ii
agameru imi ga afureru mae ni
orijinaru no jigoku ni ochite

Please!
Hate even more and steal away the limits.
Your impulses don’t matter anymore.
Before the meaning you worship overflows,
Fall into original hell.

どうか
もっと描いて 後悔なんてしないで
雑音なんて消えてしまえ
浪費してる言葉で呼んで
終わりのない温度で焼き尽くして

douka
motto egaite koukai nante shinaide
zatsuon nante kiete shimae
rouhi shiteru kotoba de yonde
owari no nai ondo de yaki tsukushite

Please!
Draw even more. Don’t regret it…
All that noise should just disappear.
I call using wasted words
and burn things to nothing with an endless heat.

震わせてみてよ

furuwasete mite yo

I’ll make you tremble!