純愛イミテーション
jun’ai imiteeshon
Pure Love Imitation
Vocals: 桜璃 (Sakura), LifeRubato
Lyrics: 桜璃 (Sakura)
Composed by: LifeRubato
Album: 愛憎ディストーション
Circle: Chocolate Lolita
Release date: 30 October 2016
Requested by: Kurorenka
Buy a digital copy of the album on BOOTH!
In some parts of this song (for example, stanza 3), the male singer sings something different to the female singer. My impression is that the guy is open to what the girl is saying (i.e. ‘I want to be a place for you to return to.).
歌詞
笑顔を振り撒きながら
心の隅で思っていた
このまま一緒に居ても
彼に得られるものは無い
安らげる場所でいれば
彼女に尽くし続けたなら
いつの日か振り向いてくれる
そう信じるしかなかった
離れていく事ができない
でも誓いの言葉は交わせない
いつまでも私の帰る場所
そのままでいて欲しい
幸あれと祈れど 寄り掛かったまま
未来へ進めない事気付いていた
利用している自己否定の中
踠いている
彼女の葛藤に気付いていながら
対価と体を奪い続けた
利用してるのはお互い同じ
黙ったままで
いつまでも金貨でしか
愛を量れないままでいる
きっと彼は私を
心から愛してるだろう
でも違うの、本当に欲しい
何かと少しずれているのよ
その小さな溝は埋められない
理解されないまま
幸ある場所それは この腕の中と
何時になったら気付いて貰える?
その価値観ごと全てを知って
抱き締めてる
その優位に立った目線が嫌いで
仕方のない事だと解ってるけど
覆った視界に気付かないまま
首が絞まる
純白のドレスに身を包んでいる
私は貴方との糸を切った
心の隅に追いやっていた日を
認め受け入れる事ができない
流れる時間 解けない心
小さな出逢い暖かく包む
再び廻る軋んだ歯車
満たされていく
欠けたピース求め 覗いた季節に
貴方の新たな足跡見出して
絡まっていく糸の端握り
立ち尽くした
Romanisation
egao o furimaki nagara
kokoro no sumi de omotte ita
kono mama issho ni itemo
kare ni erareru mono wa nai
yasurageru basho de ireba
kanojo ni tsukushi tsudzuketa nara
itsu no hi ka furimuite kureru
sou shinjiru shika nakatta
hanarete iku koto ga dekinai
demo chikai no kotoba wa kawasenai
itsu made mo watashi no kaeru basho
sono mama de ite hoshii
shiawase are to inoredo yori kakatta mama
mirai e susumenai koto kidzuite ita
riyou shite iru jiko hitei no naka
mogaite iru
kanojo no kattou ni kidzuite inagara
taika to karada o ubai tsudzuketa
riyou shiteru no wa otagai onaji
damatta mama de
itsu made mo kinka de shika
ai o hakarenai mama de iru
kitto kare wa watashi o
kokoro kara aishiteru darou
demo chigau no, hontou ni hoshii
nanika to sukoshi zurete iru no yo
sono chiisana mizo wa umerarenai
rikai sarenai mama
shiawase aru basho sore wa kono ude no naka to
itsu ni nattara kidzuite moraeru?
sono kachikan goto subete o shitte
dakishimeteru
sono yuui ni tatta mesen ga kirai de
shikata no nai koto da to wakatteru kedo
ootta shikai ni kidzukanai mama
kubi ga shimaru
junpaku no doresu ni mi o tsutsunde iru
watashi wa anata to no ito o kitta
kokoro no sumi ni oi yatte ita hi o
mitome ukeireru koto ga dekinai
nagareru jikan tokenai kokoro
chiisana deai atatakaku tsutsumu
futatabi meguru kishinda haguruma
mitasarete iku
kaketa piisu motome nozoita kisetsu ni
anata no arata na ashiato midashite
karamatte iku ito no hashi nigiri
tachi tsukushita
Translation
While lavishing him with smiles
I thought deep inside
that though we might stay together
there’s nothing he could gain from it.
If I could be in a peaceful place
and keep devoting myself to her
then someday she’d look back at me.
All I could do was believe that.
I can’t leave your side
and yet we can’t exchange vows.
I want you to stay as you are,
as a place for me to return to.
Though I prayed for you to be happy, I just depended on you.
I realised I couldn’t move on.
I’m struggling within the self-denial
that I use.
I noticed her struggles
and kept stealing her worth and her body.
We’re both the same, using things
while staying quiet.
I could only ever measure love
with money.
I wonder if he loves me
from the bottom of his heart.
But that’s wrong, things are a bit a different
to what I actually want.
I can’t fill in that small hole
while I’m not understood.
When will you realise that your happiness
is right here in my arms?
I’ll understand your values
and embrace you.
I hated your dominant gaze
and knew I couldn’t do anything about it
and yet I wrung my neck, unaware
that you weren’t looking.
I was wearing a brilliant white dress
when I cut the thread tying me to you.
I can’t come to terms with the day
I was chased to a corner of my heart.
Time flows, and my heart remains bound.
A small encounter; a warm embrace.
The creaky gears start turning again
and I am fulfilled.
I searched for my missing piece, and I found
fresh footprints from you in the seasons.
I held tight to the edge of the thread tying me up
and stood still.
Releska 
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