イニシエイション || Initiation

イニシエイション
inishieishon
Initiation

Vocals: めらみぽっぷ (Meramipop)
Lyrics: RD-Sounds
Arranged by: RD-Sounds
Album: 秘封祭 オリジナル・サウンド・トラック (Hifuusai Original Soundtrack) [Official site]
Circle: 凋叶棕 (Diao ye zong)
Published by: 四面楚歌 (Shimensoka)
Event: C91
Original Theme: Girls’ Sealing Club [少女秘封倶楽部]

Requested by: Rin

This track is part of the soundtrack of a doujin game released during C90. The official site pulls no punches – written at the very top is ‘Merry bad end,’ which is the title of a special book accompanying a special edition of the game released at C91 with the OST.

I’m still not entirely sure what to make of the lyrics. To begin with, I thought that the track was about Sumireko, pulling some timey wimey shenanigans to prevent the continuation of the Sealing Club in Renko and Merry’s era. But, with the ‘Merry bad end’ message in mind, I think it might actually be about Merry dealing with/eradicating multiple different personalities in her mind. Please let me know if you’ve read the associated novel, or have any theories of your own, because I’d like to get closer to finding out the true meaning of this track…!

It also seems like this track is linked to the other Diao ye zong vocal track, Celebration. I’d like to have a look through that, too…

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非公式の英訳/Unofficial translation

I felt countless gazes upon my back
Filled with malice
As if saying “why me?”

If you want to curse someone, then please curse me
But even if you do, I won’t stop.

I won’t look away, I won’t forget
Because they, too, are me.
Still, I search. I search for a future absent of that way of life.

Therefore…
I crush them
Suffocate them
All so they’ll never be born again.

I gather my strength and take another step.

And
I crush them underfoot
Eradicate their wishes
All so they’ll never be able to dream again.

I place my feet upon the ground. (1)
Firmly, firmly! Firmly! I stamp my foot down. And afterwards…

…I want to see you.

I mark out the final blank space
That must be filled.
It’s the same shape as you.

And if, say, there’s nothing after this
Even if I pursue the worst possibility…

I will not look away, I will not run away
Because that, too, is me.
Still, I will take that way of life to heart and walk onwards.

Therefore
I’ll trample them underfoot
Exterminate them
So they can never again come to life.

I am here. There’s only one me.

Therefore
I’ll trample them to death
Exterminate their hopes
So they won’t start moving again.

I stretch a hand to the sky. (2)
Higher, higher! Higher! I hold it out. And afterwards…

…I want to see you.

Yes, until I meet you
At the end of this ‘road’…

Yes, until you and I
Begin walking toward the future…

Yes, until you and I
Decide what shape tomorrow will take…

Yes, until you and I
Can turn our dreams into reality…

I’m fine with you.
I’m fine with you.
I want to be with you – that’s all I want.

This story hasn’t even started yet. (3)

Therefore
I keep moving
I leave everything behind
And I simply continue to walk upon this road.

I place my feet upon the ground (a corpse).
Firmly, firmly! Firmly! I stamp my foot down. And afterwards…

Strongly, strongly! Strongly! I let loose those words.

…I want to see you.

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Translator’s notes

(1) A corpse (死体) is written instead of ‘ground.’

(2) Blue sky (青空) is written instead of ‘sky.’

(3) Secret Sealing Club (秘封俱楽部) is written instead of ‘story.’