past lover

past lover

Vocals: lily-an
Lyrics: azuki
Arranged by: kaztora
Album: シンソウダイバー (Shinso Diver) [Official site]
Circle: Liz Triangle
Event: C90
Original theme: Dullahan Under the Willows [柳の下のデュラハン]

Requested by: Kaii Schwartz

Azuki always writes the best lyrics. Based on how I translated this song, it seems that the speaker is trying to talk to their future self to find hope to make it through some tough times. In the end, the main message of the song is that, though the present may seem dark, there’s always the possibility of a brighter tomorrow. I think that’s a really positive message! The parts in (brackets) are occasionally related to the sentences they appear in, and occasionally aren’t.

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非公式の英訳/Unofficial translation

Yes—you are you, and I am me.
I lived up until now by keeping my distance.
I put up a courageous, but doomed fight beneath the willows
And all I could do was pretend.
I wonder what my future self can see?
Where did my guiding light go?
Only shadows stretch out behind me.

Dear future self: what’s the future like?
I’m alone, and I don’t know where I’m going. I’m stuck.
Days that stay the same are so precious, (Though they’re foolish.)
But isn’t everyone only waiting (Including me)
With their heads stuck out for the arrival (the arrival)
Of change?

Up or down? Though they made my vision swim (Swimming around)
That contrary étranger just got in my way in my way. (A traveller)
I was secretly manipulated. I couldn’t take my eyes from them.
I ventured out, I got used to it, we met, we parted… Hah.
After all, nobody can live alone, can they?

Yes—you are you, and I am me.
I lived without mixing myself up in the world.
The morning star shines. So too does the mist
Though a red, red dawn descends.
Nothing will reach my future self.
Please, I just want them to tell me
Where I can find the meaning of this world.

Dear future self, or something like that (The past and the future…)
It’s that time now, too, right? (That’s not what I want)
I took out that lonely sign (I raised it high)
And I began to walk.

I just want to know. Though you let me peek at your face (Peek, hah.)
It made that thought channel, which gets in my way (Go wild.)
I was manipulated, and your voice mixed in with the static.
Saying I hate the past, present, and future—that’s nothing but an excuse.

But you are you, and I am me.
I lived up until now raising blossoms that gave no fruit.
Even if dawn breaks, bringing an end
To one fantastic night among 1000,
Nothing will reach my future self.
Please, I just want them to tell me
If there’s a place for me in this world…

Dear past self: (From the future)
The future isn’t as bad as you think. (Don’t lose your head over it.)
Even if you don’t know what’s important to you, (Surely, definitely.)
The things that seek to fill your cracked heart
Will be there forever.
Your heart will be warm. (Always, forever.) “O, light!”

Ah, I worried so much about the future
But the world was shining all along.
Now open up the door that leads to the world!
I just have to grab hold
Of that hand, stretched out without pride.
I’ll just look this way a little
And then the light will faintly illuminate my future self.
So, what’s important to me? I’ve figured it out: (Love is all.)
Throw away the scraps of pride you bear.
I love you all (My love, ah ah)
Because it’s precious, I’ll let go and leave myself behind
But because it’s precious, I won’t let go. (I won’t let go.)
Because I’m alive in this world.